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  • #8720
    Emma Wolff

    Just started my dream job. I find I am focused and head down at work during the day but when I get home, I thick to much about work and can’t relax my mind, almost start to get anxiety over ever step I made or thing I’ve said at work that day. Why am I so insecure in my work place if I am happy with my career and position for the first time in my life?

    • This topic was modified 3 weeks, 4 days ago by Emma Wolff.
    Margien Matthews

    Congratulations on your dream job!

    Here are three reasons why you may be finding it hard to switch off at the end of the day:
    a) You may be a naturally anxious person. If your anxiety is increasing to the point where it's interfering with functioning normally, please reach out to a health professional. There are many powerful ways to deal with overwhelming anxiety.
    b) You may be a perfectionist which means you set extremely high standards for yourself. And you spend a lot of time rethinking what you could have done / should have done to reach that exceptionally bar that you set yourself.
    c) You may have a strong fear of failure. Combine this with landing your dream job which is extremely important to you makes this a recipe for performance stress!

    Try the following technique to contain all those thoughts that rush into your head after work.

    When you get home, set aside ten minutes (no more!) on your own in a quiet space to address the following three topics (this is ideal for a journaling activity as well):
    a) Affirm yourself. Remind yourself of all the good qualities you possess which led you to land this job. (Example: I am talented; I am committed; I am smart)
    b) Describe what went well today (Example: Everyone liked my idea at today's meeting; I handled that difficult client very well)
    c) Describe one thing I could differently tomorrow - only one! (Example: I spoke over John when he was speaking; tomorrow I'm going to work on not interrupting people)

    Once you've done this activity, do your best to psychologically close the door on the topic of what happened at work today. You've spent ten minutes doing a mini debrief of your day and now it's time for other stuff. If your mind wanders back to what happened today, remind yourself that you've already done your debrief session and you've got an action plan for the next day.

    Then get busy doing something else - sport / preparing supper / chatting with a family member or friend / reading or watching TV etc. If you do this a few days in a row, your mind will get trained to spend only those ten minutes on reflecting and debriefing what happened at work.

    Let me know if this works!

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